She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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