google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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