sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
