so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
