Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
