we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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