Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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