Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize