Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
