"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
