How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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