i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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