She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
