Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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