When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
