it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
