Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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