Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
