There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
