Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
