big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
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