Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
