I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
