my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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