Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize