its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
