Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Randomize
