I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
