:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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