so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
You need a sexual gate keeper
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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