she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
