this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
