No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
