I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
