found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
