Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
