take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
