have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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