It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Can you bring me the toilet please
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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