Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
