I want to walk on stilts...naked
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
