She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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