but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
That accounts for only three of the penises
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize