Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Randomize
