I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
you will always have a special place in my vag
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
He's a Shit stain on my heart
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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