i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
