Only a mothe r could love this liver
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize