We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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