My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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