My room smells like vodka and shame
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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